I Want You to Want Me
by lukeandlor383
Summary: After Lorelai and Christopher’s split Lorelai leaves the house while Christopher packs his things. With nowhere to go in the meantime, she goes to the town square to think… Eventually a LL Story, ‘cause really, what else is there? HIATUS!
1. I want you to want me

**I Want You to Want Me**

* * *

**Four Part-er.**

**Inspired by the episode, _Farewell, My Pet._ & the song _I Want You to Want Me_ by_ Cheap Trick_**

**Chapter One: I Want You to Want Me**

**Summary: After Lorelai and Christopher's split Lorelai leaves the house while Christopher packs his things. With nowhere to go in the meantime, she goes to the town square to think… Eventually a LL Story, 'cause really, what else is there?**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with Gilmore Girls, or Cheap Trick. However I'm doing my best to work on it…I'll keep you updated.**

* * *

When most people think Lorelai Gilmore, they think "happy, cheerful, witty, and quirky" right? That was the old Lorelai Gilmore. Now when you hear that name its most commonly associated with, "sad, unfortunate, and distant". That's not generally something you want to be associated with. So tonight, she did something about it. She stopped lying to her husband, her daughter, her best friend, and most importantly…herself. Tonight, for the first time in a long time she said how she truly was feeling. She did what she now knows was the right thing. She broke off her marriage. While some might see that as a horrible thing that should take a lot of time to get over anyone that knows Lorelai is silently jumping for joy. Giving her a round of applause for her … achievement.

After sitting for a moment of somewhat uncomfortable silence Christopher, for once in his life said something helpful, "I should go, um, get my stuff."

"Sure, yeah. I'm gonna go out, for…yeah. Okay. You get your stuff. I'll be back in an hour or so," Lorelai said after regaining composure. Wiping her eyes and grabbing her coat, she walked out of her house. Not taking a single look behind her as she went. When she started walking she wasn't exactly sure where she was going, or what she was doing. When she closed the front door behind her she had one of those, 'wait, what the hell just happened?' moments. Before realizing, what she did was for the best. He wasn't happy and in the long run, she wouldn't be either. So, for a minute, she just walked. Straight ahead. _No looking back, 'cause there are no regrets._

"Hey sugah! What's goin' on!?" Babbette greeted while Lorelai made her way down the front porch steps, pulling her coat closer to her. Babbette was sitting on her porch nursing a cup of coco enjoying the company of her husband Morey.

"Nothing Babbette, just going for a walk, that's all." Lorelai shouted back, pulling her coat tighter around her. She tried to mask the pain in her voice but Babbette caught on.

"Alright sugah, call me later, kay?"

"Sure, sure." Lorelai nodded her head and began walking down her road. When she finally made it to her destination which she decided was the gazebo, she was forced by her subconscious into tears again. _Why me? Why couldn't I have just followed through with something for once?_ _Because it didn't make you happy._ She answered herself. _Great, now I'm talking and answering myself in my head. Its official, I'm crazy._ Lorelai sat in a comfortable silence for a little while. Occasionally folding and unfolding her hands trying to keep herself busy so she doesn't drive herself clinically insane. She was so lost in her thoughts she didn't notice someone walk up the gazebo's steps and sit beside her.

"Hey, you alright?"

"Luke, hi. Yeah," She sniffled, "I'm fine,"

"You're not fine. What happened?" He asked kneeling down in front of her, placing his hand lovingly on her knee.

"Nothing, I swear. Its fine, I'm fine, everything's…fine." She suddenly felt the need to burst into tears again.

"You're not fine. Something's wrong, you're crying and I can see it in your eyes." He gently pulled her chin up to face him, "Lorelai, tell me what's wrong."

"Christopher and I are over."

"So naturally you're upset. Come 'ere." He said, pulling himself up to join her on the bench. She, not knowing what else to do let him embrace her like he did three years ago when she asked for the 30,000-dollar loan to open her Inn.

"That's the weird thing, that's not what I'm upset about. Sure, that's big and not good, and I should be…I don't know, heartbroken! But I'm not. I'm upset because…no, never mind. It's not important."

"If it's making you this upset, it's important. You can trust me Lorelai. You know that."

"I do," She cried, placing her head on his shoulder and in her hands. "I know that now! If I trusted you then, then I wouldn't be in this situation. I'd be happy! I'd be…I'd have my whole package!" She somewhat screamed.

"Okay, calm down and rewind for me. What are you talking about!?" Luke begged for an answer, it wasn't often he was confused when talking to Lorelai Gilmore, but he was rusty, having not had a good in depth conversation with her, in over six months.

"You! Luke, it's always been you! Not Christopher, or whoever. You! I've been lying to you, and Christopher and myself! I just- I can't do that anymore. I love you Luke it's always been you. It'll always be you! Sookie was right, and, and everyone else was right. God, my mother was right!" She spat, running her hands through her hair.

"Lorelai…" Luke reasoned, "you're just upset…"

"No I'm not! Luke, just listen to me. We were talking and-'"

"Who?"

"Christopher and I, we were talking and he said stuff about you and I said 'if it were just feelings, we could fix it, with time' and he said 'but we can't.' See! He knows and I know, now you just…you need to know. It probably can't work now and I know that, but I just, I need you to know that it's you. It'll always be you." Luke said nothing after that. He just sat there, comforting his sobbing _friend._ "You, Luke…you…" She whispered into his green jacket. Luke still said nothing, just held her close and stroked her hair, just like he did before.

"I'm sorry," Lorelai apologized about an hour later. "I didn't mean to dump all that on you, I shouldn't have…I'm sorry," She got up to leave, but the hand grasping her wrist said otherwise. "Luke, really, I should just go." She said wiping her eyes with her free hand.

"Sit." He commanded almost inaudibly.

"I shouldn't…"

"Lorelai, we should talk…"

* * *

_I Want You to Want Me_**

* * *

**

**Just so, you all know, these will mostly be short. I have my reasons. And will probably be updated quickly. I don't have any of the other chapters written yet, since this was kind of impromptu but, I know where it needs to go. This should be complete in about 1-2 weeks.**

Alaina Rose


	2. I need you to need me

I Want You to Want Me

Chapter Two: I Need You to Need Me

Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with Gilmore Girls, or Cheap Trick. However I am doing my best to work on it…I will keep you updated.

**Important: This chapter is written in Lorelai's point of view.**

* * *

"_Sit." Luke commanded almost inaudibly._

"_I shouldn't…"_

"_Lorelai, we should talk…"_

Reluctantly I sat down again. I folded her hands in my lap and looked at Luke. Luke, the man who should hate me, the one person in the world who has the right to hate me, wants to talk.

"Why don't you hate me?" I asked, looking straight into his eyes.

"I don't have any reason to hate you." He said, staring back.

"I beg to differ." I laughed quietly. "I can think of about 6 reasons you should hate me. You're allowed you know. You should. I would like it if you didn't, but you have the right. I was horrible; I am horrible. I really should go. I'm not helping the situation at all. I'm not even sure that our… _situation_ can be helped, now. If ever, really. Anyway, I should leave." I feel like an idiot now, I can't even think straight.

"I told you to stay. I said we should talk. I need you Lorelai. I'm not … me without you. Ask anyone. Lane or Caesar would probably be the most reliable people to ask. On the other hand, Ms. Patty. Babbette could probably help, too. Regardless of who you ask; I need you."

"You don't, Luke. You don't. You're amazing by yourself. You can hold your own. You can do it by yourself. You're the independent, self-reliant one here. Me on the other hand…"

"Don't Lorelai. Don't try to put yourself down in front of me."

"Fine.. whatever. I just, I need to go. This isn't the right time, I'm a mess right now. I need to… to think. About this and everything. Get my thoughts straight, yah know? You should probably do the same." Immediately I stand up to leave again.

"Lorelai." He says, reaching for my hand, unfortunately I wasn't quick enough to pull it away. He holds my hand in his strong grasp that I've missed far too much and looks me square in the eye. "I want this to work. Me and you. If you need time, I understand. I waited eight years for you. I shouldn't have just given all that up. I shouldn't have. That was stupid on my part." He had a point there. "I should have ran after you the second you left the diner that night. I could have made everything right, then. We could be married right now. Us, not you and Christopher. If it's Christopher, you want that's fine. I want you to be happy. I would much prefer it be with me, but if I don't make you happy and he does, stop worrying about me. Knowing your happy keeps me moving." This is the most I've ever heard him talk in one sitting, I think. "You look me in the eye, and tell me that you don't love me, that you love Christopher and I will let go of your hand and let you go home and work things out." My eyes brim with tears that instantly threaten to fall.

"Have you been listening to _anything_ I've been saying, or is that cap of yours on too tight?" His grip on my hand loosens a little. "I love you, Luke." I say simply. "I never loved Christopher, it's like… like Max." He starred at me with a confused look about him. "I wanted so much to love Max that I almost married him. The situation with Christopher is same. I wanted to love him, but I couldn't. But I couldn't bring myself to say no when he asked me to marry him. I don't know why… I don't know. It's… this whole thing is screwed up." Luke didn't say anything. So I broke the short silence, "I'm sorry." I said.

"For what?" Luke asked, cocking his head slightly at me.

"I'm not sure, really." I replied honestly. "Seemed like the right thing to say at the time." Luke nodded. "Can I have my hand back now?" I ask, to make things more comfortable. As much as I would love to continue holding his hand, I can't. It still hurts to be so close to him and not be with him.

"Yeah," He cleared his throat and dropped my hand. "sorry." I sit back down, about six inches away from him. Distance is probably good right now. He looks at me yet again.

"So… what now?" I ask, just loud enough for him to hear.

"I dunno." He told me. I didn't know either, but something needed to happen soon. Something, anything… I couldn't sit next to him just staring at him anymore. It was driving me crazy.

"I need a lawyer." I blurted out, randomly.

"Okay?" Luke replied, he obviously hadn't the slightest idea what I was talking about.

"I have to get divorced. I need a lawyer." I rephrased.

"Right. Yeah, okay. I could… help you…you know, if you want…" Ever-thoughtful Luke. Honestly though, how was he going to help me find a lawyer? He hated lawyers.

"I think- I think I can handle that much on my own. Thank you though." I wanted to lean over and kiss him, I stopped myself before I did though, agreeing with my inner voice that it would be inappropriate and probably make things worse. We sat in silence for a few minutes neither of us knew what to say, so once again I broke the silence, "Have you ever heard the _Cheap Trick_ song? _I Want You to Want Me?_" I asked him.

"Uh, no I don't think so. Why?"

"I dunno, it's a good song. I just- needed to say something. Silence gets to me…" I told him, though he already knew.

"Yeah, I know." He said, predictably. Luke looked down, he was frustrated. He looked me in the eye, trying to tell what I was thinking. But unlike with him, looking into my eyes won't tell you what I'm thinking, or how I'm feeling. I can put up a wall, blocking out my feelings. I'm ever-happy Lorelai Gilmore, remember? I'm always smiling. He's the only person I'll take down that wall for… but not tonight. I can't let him see me vulnerable. I don't know why… I just can't.

"Hey, Luke?"

"Yeah,"

"I need you." I said, standing up, being sure to put my hands in my pockets so he won't try and stop me again. I smile at him, genuinely, and begin the short walk back to my house.

* * *

I completely forgot about this story.

I'm sooo sorry.

Next update soon.


	3. I'm Beggin' You to Beg Me

I Want You to Want Me

Chapter Three: I'm Beggin' you to Beg Me

Disclaimer: Nope. Not me.

**IMPORTANT:** This chapter is written in _Luke's _Point of View; and I'm not a guy, so please give me a break if it sounds a little girly.

A/N: I'm aware of the OOC-ness. One more chapter to go! & this wasn't beta-ed, if something doesn't make sense please leave a review and tell me!

* * *

I let her walk for a few minutes before I jump to my feet and run after her. I can't let her get away this time, not again.

"Lorelai," I shout, jogging to catch up with her. I knew doing Track in High School would help eventually. "Lorelai," I repeat, this time getting her attention.

She turns around and looks at me. Arms folded, blue eyes clouded with tears. "Luke, please. This is hard enough as it is without you following me." I don't respond, but instead act on impulse, step forward and kiss her square on the mouth. A kiss that rivaled the one on the front porch steps of the Dragonfly three years ago. Then she pulled away. "Luke, I can't do this right now. I want to, I really do. You don't understand how much I want this. But I can't. Right now things are just so screwed up and turned around that I can't even think straight." By this time tears are pouring down her flushed cheeks and I want so much just to reach out and wipe them away. Tell her it'll be okay, and walk her home. But I can't. I caused this. I made her cry. Just the thought of upsetting her unnerves me.

"Lorelai, please," I try once more to get her to listen. "I really need this. You're everything. I can't do anything without being reminded of you. Not being with you is driving me crazy. I know, I always said you were certifiably insane… but right now, it's me. I'm the one that needs to be put in the padded room with the rhinestone straightjacket." Then, she smiled a little. Recalling the Rhinestone-Straightjacket conversation we'd once had.

"You remembered the rhinestone straightjacket Rory promised me." She sniffled. "God Luke, you're just making this harder." She closed eyes tightly and took a deep breath. "I have to go home and so do you. I'll see you… I'll see you around." She turned on her heal and walked home. I couldn't find it in me to move. So I didn't. When is saw her walk up her front porch steps and then inside her house, I turned around and went home as well. Tomorrow would be better...I hoped.

But, it wasn't. She hadn't come by the diner at all. Drive, walk, run, skip, hop… nothing. I gave up hope around two o'clock and closed up shop. "Caesar, you can go home. it's slow, I can handle it." I told my cook. Ten minutes after he left I locked the doors and went upstairs. For the last few months I barley went into my apartment. It was there strictly for sleeping and eating. I didn't go up there but once a day. When I got upstairs I immediately went to the fridge to grab a beer, I twisted off the cap and sat down in my recliner chair. Instantly hundreds of memories flooded my mind. Memories I'd tried so hard over the past few months to forget. I was so deep in thought that I almost didn't notice when my phone rang.

"Hello," I said into the phone, emotionless.

"I think this is the best way to go about doing this. Over the phone," Her sweet voice came through the line. I smiled and nodded, before I realized that she couldn't see me.

"Yeah. Over the phone, is fine." I told her, happy to get any contact at all.

"Okay, good." She replied. "First off, why don't you hate me?" I can't believe she asked me that, is she that naive?

"I don't have any reason to hate you, Lorelai." I try to reason with her calmly.

"God, I feel like we're having the same conversation over and over again. You should hate, you're aloud to hate me. I cheated on you, Luke. I would hate. I did hate me for a while."

"You didn't cheat on me. You were upset. He took advantage of you." I raise my hands to my hair and run my fingers through it, in frustration.

"As much as I hate to admit it, it takes two to tango, Luke. I cheated on you, and it was wrong. I realize that, what I don't get is why you have to do this…"

"Do what!?" I loose my temper, slightly. I'm confused at what she's getting at. Didn't she, just last night, tell me that she needed me?

"I don't know! I have no idea what I'm talking about anymore. I'm sorry." We both sit in silence for a few minutes. "I have to go," She said, barely audible.

"Lorelai, don't. Don't call me and say we should talk and then just hang up. I can't play games. I need you.. remember that? You told me you needed me, well guess what I need you too! This isn't a one-sided thing. I love you… I forgive you. I just… I don't want to do this anymore I want you to suck it up and realize that I _did_ want to marry you, you just didn't give me a second to respond. I would have said yes! I would have happily taken you to Martha's Vineyard and eloped. I just needed a second to figure it out. And I think you knew that. I think you knew that it would take me a minute to process and you were just too damn impatient to wait ten more seconds." That's the most I've said at one time in six months, easy. I can hear her crying, but I don't say anything more.

"I'm sorry. I should have waited. I love you, Luke. I was scarred and hurt that you postponed the wedding. I didn't know what else to do." She said quietly, taking deep breaths between every few words. It kills me that I made her cry, but I know there's nothing I can do.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah."

"Why did you marry _him?"_ I ask her, she pauses for a moment. I can hear a sharp intake of breath from her end.

"I thought it would help me get over you." She said slowly. "I wanted to be over you." Neither of us said anything for a while. "So, what now?" I didn't have the slightest clue of what to do now.

"I don't know." I replied.

"Okay, well, this was productive." She sighed.

"Lorelai, do you... or did you... love him?" I asked her, hoping, no, praying her answer was 'no'.

"I wanted to...because he was Rory's father. But, no. I never really loved him. I've never loved anyone but you." She sounded confident. That was a good sign.

"Where do we go from here?" I asked her, switching the phone from my left to right ear.

"Do we start over? Pick up from where we left off... or, take this as some sort of closure?"

"This can't be closure, Lorelai. Haven't we already established that?"

"We can't start over either."

"We can't pick up from where we left off... could we? Wouldn't that be weird?"

"Weird, no. Potentially harmful, probably." We were stuck. Neither of us knew exactly what to do. "We really shouldn't do anything until I'm divorced." She said, she sounded almost... happy as she said it, which was a little odd.

"Right, not until after you're... _divorced._" Made me angry just saying the word. I still couldn't grasp the fact that she was married to someone else. I could barley picture it. If I hadn't seen the fake smile plastered to her porcelain-like features as she walked through the town with _him_ in tow, not two weeks ago, I wouldn't believe it. "So, I'll talk to you then?"

"Yeah, I'll talk to you then." She said, "But... Luke?"

"Yeah?"

"Don't change your mind."

"I wouldn't think of it."

And we both hung up.

* * *

**So, this chapter wasn't very good. But I only got TWO reviews for the last chapter. Two... that makes me sad. If it wasn't good people should have told me so I wasn't to waste my time. Time that I could spend working on stories that some people actually like. ****L**

** One more chapter to go I suppose. **

**But I ask that you PLEASE REVIEW. It really does make a huge difference. **


End file.
